Does Marriage Change Anything?

How has marriage changed your relationship? I was kind of surprised at how many times I was asked this question after our wedding. I hadn’t actually thought about it before. Was I expecting anything to change? Was Joel? Was something supposed to change? I know every relationship and every marriage is different. But to be honest.. YES, our relationship has changed.

But for the better.

I honestly wasn’t expecting anything to be different. And I guess the actual dynamics of our relationship haven’t changed, but truthfully, the love I feel for him now – it’s completely different than anything I felt for him before. Sometimes I’m just stunned to think that someone could love me enough to vow to spend forever with me. I love knowing that I have this person in my life that promised me and promised our family and friends that he would be there through thick and thin.

Yes, yes, I know. People get divorced. And both of us have experienced our fair share of failed and dysfunctional relationships in our families and in our own lives. But maybe that’s a GOOD thing for us. We’ve seen what we don’t want to do. We’ve seen what doesn’t work. We’ve seen what causes a relationship to fall apart. We’ve even had our own relationship fall apart before. But we were together for almost 6 years before getting married. We made sure we were ready to take that big step. We take our marriage seriously and I think we both do a pretty good job at making it successful so far. 🙂

Joel and I have actually had this conversation before. He mentioned this story one time and it still makes me think. He said the one day at work (before we got married) he was talking with his male coworkers and they were all saying how their wives forbid them from doing certain things – going to bars with their friends, riding a motorcycle, playing video games, etc, etc. They all talked about their “ball and chain” and they were warning Joel to be prepared for his life to change dramatically after marriage. And then we got married. And nothing changed. I never told him he couldn’t do those things before, so why would I start doing that now?

Now I’m definitely not an expert on marriage – we’ve only been married for less than a year and half! But I like to think I’m doing a pretty good job so far. So here’s my tips for you, dear readers.

1. Learn to trust – A relationship will not work if there’s no trust. It just won’t.

2. Don’t try to change him (too much) – Some things you can change, and some you just can’t. Joel will always play video games. It’s who he is. But putting glasses in the dishwasher instead of on the counter? I’m working on it.

3. Be affectionate and passionate – Hug him. Kiss him. Tell him you love him. Tell him how lucky you are to have him. Thank him. Men like to be praised just as much as women do!

4. Flirt with him – Yes, I know you’re already married. But flirt with him.

5. Find common interests – Joel and I don’t have much in common, but we both love a super scary horror movie/show. Ghosts or zombies? Yes please!

6. Just have fun – I don’t believe that marriage should be work. I think laughing and being goofy with each other is one of the easiest ways to have a successful relationship. Laughter fixes almost anything, seriously.

Now don’t judge – I truthfully didn’t spend a ton of time on this. I just came up with the first few things that came to my mind. Marriage is a work in progress. Every relationship is different. Things that work for one couple don’t always work for another couple. But just have fun and go from there.

What’s the best relationship advice you ever received?

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30 Day “What If” Challenge

Okay, so I’ve seriously sucked at this challenge recently. I always seem to be updating in a hurry and never remember to look up my next question. So here we are. I’m going to do like 5 of them to get myself (kind of) back on track. Let’s go!

30 Day “What If” Challenge

Day 20 :  What if you had to choose between your best friend and your boyfriend, which would you choose?
Well, considering I’m married, I’m not sure if this one still applies to me. And I would hope that neither my husband or my best friend would make me choose one or the other, but if I had to, I would choose my husband. He’s truly my best friend. I don’t think much of an explanation is needed for this one.

Day 21 :  What if you had to choose, would you give up your sight or your hearing?
Oh, this is tough, but I think I would give up my hearing. I know it would be awful to never be able to hear my future children’s cries or their voices or anything, but could you imagine not being able to SEE them? I couldn’t imagine a life without reading or watching my dogs play outside or seeing the leaves change colors or seeing a rainbow or seeing anything for that matter. Wow. Actually.. I guess it wasn’t that hard of a question.

Day 22 :  What if you received lottery tickets as a gift at the office party, and you won $30,000, would you share the winnings with the person that gave you the gift?
This is why lottery tickets are not good gifts! Who would want to be put in this situation?! I would like to say that I’d split the money, but truthfully, I’d probably try to get away with only giving the person a little bit of it. Seriously though, after taxes $30,000 is going to be next to nothing! I don’t know, I hope I wouldn’t be greedy. Maybe I could just keep it a secret and not tell anyone?

Day 23 :  What if you saw a robbery, would you report it?
What kind of question is this? Of course I would.

Day 24 :  What if you were given a chance to go to the moon, would you go? Why or why not?
I think I would! How cool would that be?! Although I think I’d be quite terrified of being in such a small space for so long. I tend to get claustrophobic when I feel like I don’t have control over a situation. But if I could get over my fears – including the fear of possibly dying in an exploding space shuttle – then I would definitely do it. It would be awesome to see Earth from space.

Day 25 :  What if you were given one million dollars, what would you buy?
My husband and I have had this conversation several times before! Truthfully, I wouldn’t do anything exciting. I would pay off our house, our cars, and our student loans. Then I would give some to my mom. Then I would set some aside for our future children’s college funds. And then if there was anything else, I would go buy myself some super cute clothes and shoes. And maybe a little house in the mountains on a lake. Maybe buy my husband a motorcycle. I’d rather just pay off everything we currently have so we wouldn’t be spending so much every months on bills.

PHEW.

Feel free to answer any of the above questions 🙂
I love hearing your answers!

It’s OK Thursday #3

((Linking up with Neely at A Complete Waste of Makeup and Amber at Brunch with Amber for It’s OK Thursday))

It’s OK..

That I did absolutely nothing last weekend and I’ve been slacking ever since. I have so much going on with work that I needed a few days to recover and recharge my brain. And I’ve been slacking in my blogging too.. I’m sorry!

It’s OK..

That I let my husband take care of all the maintenance stuff with my car. I cook, clean, do laundry, take care of the house, etc.. the least he could do it take care of my car for me!

It’s OK..

That I have to do laundry in the middle of the week because I only have 3 outfits for work and I picked up a night of overtime this week.. meaning I need 4 outfits. I really need to go shopping for work clothes..

It’s OK..

That my living room looks like this on a regular basis. Somehow my cute, little, furry devils manage to find hidden stuffed dog toys and promptly destroy them all over my house. I just cleaned up an identical mess on Monday.. and it’s only Thursday!

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She doesn’t like posing for pictures.

It’s OK..

That one of the cords for our blinds broke over the weekend and we have yet to replace it.. so the dogs now have to share a couch cushion in order to get the maximum amount of sunlight during the afternoons.

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Who couldn’t love those faces?

It’s NOT OK..

That one of our NEW windows – that we replaced in October – started leaking last night during the storm and allowed a huge puddle of rainwater to gather on our windowsill, the carpet, and saturated the wall at the top of the window. UGH. Thankfully, the window people are currently here fixing it.

30 Day “What If” Challenge

Day 18 :  What if you had to choose between love and no money or money and no love for the rest of your life, which would you choose?

Oh, this one’s so easy! I would definitely pick love and no money. Yes, it would be terrible to not have any money – and I’d be constantly freaking out – but it’d be MUCH more terrible to not have any love. I’m sure it’d be awesome to buy anything and everything I could possibly ever want.. but how enjoyable would that be if you didn’t have anyone to share it with?

What would you choose?

Marriage and Old People

Source: lovequotesrus.tumblr.com via Cybill on Pinterest

Sunday Social #1

((First time linking up with Ashley from Ashley Lately and Neely from A Complete Waste of Makeup for Sunday Social! Feel free to link up!))

Sunday Social

1. What is your ideal way to relax?

A glass of wine, a good book (or my Kindle), and a bath with lavender scented candles or bubble bath.

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2. Where is your favorite place to be?

At the beach! Walking on the boardwalk.. listening to the waves.. looking at the sun or moon reflecting on the water.. it’s beautiful! Not to mention pretty romantic 😉

3. Who do you consider your biggest role model?

Definitely my mom. Yes, she’s had her ups and downs in her life.. but she’s conquered everything and she’s an absolutely awesome person. She took care of my grandparents (her parents) right up until the day they died. She did everything she possibly could to make their lives better. And she’s also an awesome mom and my best friend.

4. What does your life look like in 3 years?

Well, hopefully I’m further in my career as a nurse – Nurse manager? Care coordinator? And hopefully we have a little one and maybe another little one on the way?

5. If you could go back and change one decision, what would it be?

Honestly, I can’t think of one major decision in my life that I would want to change. The bad decisions we make along the way are the things that make us grow! There’s definitely stupid things I did during the summer that Joel and I weren’t together, but what’s the point of dwelling on that? I’m super happy with where my life is right now.

                                           Source: marylenagbang.tumblr.com via Cybill on Pinterest

 

6. What is your biggest accomplishment in life so far?

By the age of 25 I’ve managed to graduate college, get an awesome job, move 500 miles away from my family, marry my soulmate, and buy our first house. I’d say I’m doing okay.

30 Day “What If” Challenge

Day 17 :  What if you had 25-hour days (while everyone else continued to have 24-hour days), what would you do with the extra time?

Oh gosh, this is a terrible question to ask me. I lose hours of my day on a regular basis. I’d probably end up sleeping it away or watching trashy reality tv and not even realize I had an extra hour. If I was really motivated – I’d say I’d take that extra time to prepare super awesome meals for my dear hubby. Or play with my dogs. Or clean my house. But in all actuality, I’d probably just lay on the couch and watch tv. Not very motivated, eh?

What would you do with an extra hour?

Words of Wisdom

Just thought I’d share some words of wisdom with everyone 🙂

 

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I want this in my house!

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Always be yourself!

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Never, ever settle.

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Love this.

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Hmm, interesting..

((None of the above pictures are mine. I found them all on Pinterest. Click on each image for original source.))

Monday Already?

Well, I didn’t update yesterday for two reasons..

1. I was lazy.

2. Date night with the hubby!

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#BCBG #orange #isthenewpink

So with that being said, I ran 800 errands today and decided to make fajitas for supper. Fajitas are definitely a favorite in our household – and they’re super, super easy to make.

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Chicken, onions and peppers for the main stuff.
Tomatoes and cilantro for pico de gallo.

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These tortilla strips are #thebomb.

And then the most important part – THE SAUCE. This stuff is seriously amazing! I always make sure to shake it up really well, because all the seasoning is at the bottom of the packet so you gotta make sure you scoop all the good stuff out.

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Oh, heavenly sauce.

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NOMS!

Lastly – the pico de gallo! I’ve pretty much perfected my recipe, but I don’t really have measurements for the ingredients because you just add everything to taste. Diced tomatoes, garlic (minced really, really small), cilantro, salt, pepper, and lime juice. You could also just add garlic powder if you don’t have fresh garlic. And then let it sit in the fridge for about 15 minutes. (I prefer mine to be cold – for the contrast in temperature – so I always make sure my tomatoes are in the fridge for awhile before I even make it).

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Yummy, yummy pico.

((I forgot to take a picture of the completed meal because it smelled so, so good and I couldn’t wait to eat!))

In other awesome news – I received my January Birchbox today!

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Face cream x2, shampoo, perfume, highlighter/blush in one, and lash lengthening serum – all for $10!

30 Day “What If” Challenge – Day 8

Day 8 : What if you could choose how you were going to die, what would you choose your death to be?

Well, honestly, I think this question is kind of silly. Would anyone really want to die a painful death? Hopefully I have many, many, MANY more years left, but if I had to choose, I guess I’d just choose to die in my sleep. Peacefully, without pain. Simple enough.

What would you choose?

30 Day “What If” Challenge – Day 3

Day 3 :  What if the whole world were listening, what would you say?

I’m beginning to realize this 30 Day Challenge is going to be much harder than I thought! I’m going to stick with my initial idea of saying the first thing that pops into my head and trusting my instincts. So what would I tell the whole world?

I would say.. STOP BEING SO MEAN.

Stop hating people for things that are irrelevant. Stop judging people based on their looks or income or race or religion or sexual orientation or anything else for that matter. Stop judging people because they’re different than you. Stop judging people because they look differently or talk differently or believe differently. Just stop being mean!
(
(And yes, this is something I’m working on also.))

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From Pinterest.

I would also say.. SUPPORT GAY RIGHTS.

I’m not going to go on a huge rant about this. I’m just going to say one thing – everyone deserves to love whoever they want to love. And if two people are in love, they deserve to get married.
The end.

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From Pinterest.

What would you say if the whole world were listening?

30 Day “What If” Challenge – Day 1

So I’ve been playing around on the internet looking for something to do to motivate me to update my blog.. and I’ve decided to do a DAILY QUESTION! I found this 30 Day Challenge on Tumblr and I’ve decided it’s perfect. Hopefully I can figure out how to link up with other people and get started – let me know if you’d like to join – or if you know how to help me link up with others who might be interested. So here we go!

Day 1 :  What if you were in a fire and you could only save one object, what would it be? I’m going to make this slightly more difficult and say you can’t include people or pets, because I’m going to assume that’s obvious.

Oh crap, I decide to start this and now this question is really stumping me! I’m going to go with my first thought and say my wedding dress. (I’m really big on trusting my instincts and this was the first thing that popped into my head, so I’m sticking with it).  My wedding day was truly magical. Hopefully someday I have a daughter.. and no, I wouldn’t expect her to wear my dress or veil.. but maybe somehow incorporate part of it into her wedding. And if not, it would still be awesome to have my dress to show my future children.. future grandchildren.. nieces.. whoever would enjoy seeing it! My wedding dress is a symbol of something that is very, very important to me.. and something I’ll always cherish.  (I always wear my wedding band set so I’m not counting those!)

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What would you save??

Merry (Belated) Christmas!

Ugh. So I broke my promise to you guys. I’m sorry! What kind of blogger am I that I go away for a week and a half AND THEN I don’t update for several days after I get home! Well, I seemed to have come down with yet another sinus/respiratory cold.. so I’ve been laying around and doing nothing but reading my Kindle. Which means that my house is currently in a state of disaster and my mom will be here in exactly ONE WEEK so I better get my life together!

Anyway, how was everyone’s Christmas?! Did Santa give you everything you wanted??

My first wish that came true was spending a week and a half in PA with our families and finally getting to enjoy time with them. We haven’t spent any substantial amount of time in PA since our wedding last October, so it was super awesome to see everyone. One of the best parts.. my mom’s homemade cookies! NOMS!

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Also, my mom and I attempted to make deviled eggs. “Watch out for the paprika, it comes out fast.”

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I convinced the hubby to let us give the dogs their gifts on Christmas Eve.. they got tons of stuffed toys (to eventually destroy and scatter cotton all over the house) and lots of yummy dog treats. Roxie – our Boston Terrier – loves tennis balls, so we stocked up on those. And Layla – our Boxer, who’s a rescue – finally got her own doggie bed! She’s been sleeping in it every night! I took some videos of them playing with their toys but I haven’t quite figured out how to insert them yet.. I’ll keep working on it!

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And then as for me.. well I got (almost) everything on my list! Santa was SUPER AWESOME to me this year.

1. A carpet steam cleaner and shampooer. Yes, I seriously ask for this and yes, I’m seriously super excited to use it this weekend!

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2. A super awesome printer that also prints pictures. I haven’t had a chance to use it yet, but supposedly I can print WIRELESSLY from my phone! I take way too many pictures on my phone and this printer is supposed to be one of the best!

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3. An awesome countertop makeup organizer and makeup brush set! Can’t wait to show pictures of the final, organized product! You can buy the makeup organizer here and the makeup brush set here.

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4. Another thing I got (which hasn’t been delivered yet) is the complete Gossip Girl book series. The series finale just aired on TV and now I’m super stoked to read the whole series and see how it compares! Hopefully it’s equally awesome!

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From the series finale.

There’s still one thing else that I wished for.. it just hasn’t happened yet. Keep your fingers crossed for me, please.